6.10

I know that I am way behind on an Earth Day post, but when the aha moment hits, you gotta go with it.

In keeping with my running theme of numbers as blog post titles this month, today's is 6.10.

6.10 represents my family's ecological footprint. I took this quiz, and discovered that while I feel like we do a lot for the environment, we still suck. 6.10 means that if everyone on the planet lived like we do, we would need 6.10 earths.

I recycle everything that I can, but I know that I could be reducing the amount of things that come into my house need to be recycled. While I am proud of the fact that my big blue bin (for paper recycling) is full every week, It really shouldn't be. I have tried to cut down on the amount of paper and packaging that comes into house, but it is an ongoing, never achievable task.

After spending years thinking about it, I have finally decided to get a compost bin. I am amazed at how much kitchen scraps I throw away or run down the disposal. It is time I do something about it!

With spring here and my garden ready for planting, I have decided that this will be the year I get a little bit greener. Here are the two bins I've been thinking about:

The Earthmaker composter has a 3 compartment system where I think it will be easier and faster to compost my waste.

The Deluxe Pyramid composter is one big open bin that I think will take forever to fill enough for it to start breaking the waste down for compost. However it is cheaper, but requires more turning of the compost. Decisions, Decisions.

After deliberation with Pat this morning, I think I've decided on the 3 chamber Earthmaker. Now I just have to order it and figure out where to put it in the yard. I have a small back yard with limited flat space, so I am not sure where it will go.

***I haven't ordered it yet, so if anyone has any advice for me, I'd LOVE to hear it!***

six

Today, my oh-so-middle child turns six.

Evidently, six is a big birthday. Megan has been planning and talking about this birthday for months. We have been told that she does not want a gift from all of us combined, she expects a gift from each person. I am to have pizza, cake and cupcakes (I don't understand that one) and little cups of ice cream for all the guests at her party next weekend. She knows exactly what she wants and will not be happy if it doesn't go her way.

That is most definitely Megan.

Six years ago she came into this world on her own time table...fast as hell! I was admitted at 3am and she was born at 3:45. She has been calling the shots ever since!

My hard drive crashed a few years ago and sadly I don't have all the pictures from her first days. Here's the best I can do:

Megan at 3 months

Megan today, opening her gift

After a birthday dinner at Cheeburger Cheeburger, we came home and she opened her gift. Yes, she did receive a group gift, a DSi that she has been wanting for MONTHS. She was beyond thrilled!

two

Emma turned two yesterday.

Blowing out the candle on her Carvel ice cream cake.

Must get every last drop

I am not sure where the past two years have gone. I cannot believe that my baby is now two years old. My sweet Emma has turned into an amazing little girl with loads of personality, just like her big sisters. She talks up a storm from the moment she wakes until the moment her head hits the pillow, and sometimes after that! She is exhausting, but I can't imagine life without her.

How did we get
From This

To This

eleven

Eleven years ago, I married my best friend.

Corny, I know, but true.

Lately, my friends and I have been talking about marriage and relationships a lot. Throughout these conversations, I have come to realize that while my marriage is good, it is not great. I have absolutely no doubt that my husband loves and respects me and I trust him completely. However, I don't think we are running on all the cylinders (is that even the right metaphor?).

We love our children, but they have taken over our lives. We rarely have a conversation that doesn't involve the almost daily activity pick-up/drop-off schedule. We can't have an adult conversation without being interrupted while the kids are awake. By the time they are asleep, we are barely conscious ourselves. I am convinced that we need some time to reconnect as a couple without the kids around.

We keep saying we need to get away for a weekend, or even a night, and dedicate some time to us. Unfortunately, we just keep plodding along never able to steal the time to do so.

By no means is our marriage in trouble, but I really feel that it could be so much better. I am determined to make this coming 12th year of marriage the year where we get a chance to reconnect.

What are we doing to celebrate our anniversary this year, you ask? Absolutely nothing! Pat is working tonight and I will be home alone with the girls. He told me that they Popeye's chicken we had for lunch with the girls after a morning of soccer and t-ball was my anniversary meal. Clearly, we need to dedicate some time to getting the romance back!

Signal 13

Early Easter Sunday morning, Hector Ayala was killed in a one car collision as he rushed to the aid of a Signal 13. A fellow officer who was responding to a fight call at a nearby restaurant needed assistance and called for a "Signal 13"-the police code for an officer in trouble. When this code goes out, all officers know that one of their brothers may be in a life or death situation and all effort is made to render assistance quickly.

Officer Ayala lost his life trying to save another. From what I have heard, this was par for the course for this amazing man. He touched so many lives in his short seven-year tenure as a Montgomery County Police Officer, including saving the life of a man attempting to commit suicide at the Glenmont Metro Station. He worked the midnight shift, but often came out on his off time to help translate Spanish for fellow officers. He was devoted to his wife and 15 month old son; coworkers described how happy he was to learn that he and his wife were expecting triplets this June.

As the wife of a police officer, this is hard to process.

As long as I have known Pat, I have had to struggle with the idea of him being put in harm's way; when we met he was already attending the police academy. Of course, I had no idea that early on that I would become his wife. I had no real idea what that would mean.

While we were dating and definitely after we got engaged, people would often ask me if I were scared for him, or I ever worried when he worked? They were difficult questions to answer. I would answer of yes, I worried, but I couldn't let it consume me. But, I didn't find myself worrying as often as other people seemed to think I should. I hadn't really be faced with anything that had caused me to worry too much, I guess I was in denial.

A few months into our marriage, I received a phone call from Pat's Sergeant that brought it all home to me. He called to tell me that Pat was on his way home and to "not freak out if he was covered in blood-he was ok." WHAT!?! How do you not freak out to that? A signal 13 had been called for a County officer responding to a domestic situation. While it was out of Pat's jurisdiction, he was one of the first on the scene. When Pat arrived home, he was NOT covered in blood, but did have some on his shoes. He filled me in on what happened and it felt good to know the whole story. That was the first time I remember being faced with the fact that at any time he could be that fallen officer.

Since then, there have been a few more local police deaths, including a young man that Pat attended the Police Academy with. Each one tugs at my heart and reminds me how quickly things could change.

As a police wife, I have learned that there are two types of police marriages. One in which the officer talks to his spouse about his or her day and gives them a glimpse into what they go through. The other, where there is a clear and distinct separation of work and home life. Mine is the former, more rare type of marriage. Many officers believe because it would make it too scary for those at home and would bring the stress of their job into their home. I believe to the contrary.

Maybe it is because I am a counselor by profession, or maybe it is just because of who we are as people and the mutual trust and respect we have for each other, but Pat and I couldn't imagine our marriage without full disclosure. Especially now that he is in a management role, Pat often runs situations past me and we bounce ideas back and forth. He recommends to his officers to keep their spouses informed to relieve the stress of the job. Unfortunately, not a whole lot of them follow his advice. I am a firm believer that ignorance breeds fear; if we have no idea what is going on, we build up an amazing fear of what could be going on instead of what is really happening. I am sure, Pat keeps some things to himself, and that is fine. But hearing about the types of calls he goes on and the way he handles situations, helps me to know the type of officer he is and that he has the skills to keep himself and those around him safe.

Thankfully, when he reached the rank of Sergeant, the amount of actual street time decreased. Now that he is a Lieutenant, it is even less. However, there is always that fear and concern in the back of my mind (and his) that keeps us on our toes. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't offer up a silent prayer for his (and his brothers in blue) safety.

My heart goes out to the Ayala family and especially his wife. Thank God for the kindness of legislators and strangers that there is financial help for the families of officers who die in the line of duty. Both the Federal and State governments have set up compensation for the families and COPS (Concerns of Police Survivors)does a wonderful job of providing many services to the family. There is also a fund set up by the Fraternal Order of Police Lodge 35 to aid the family.

In Memoriam:

Officer Hector Ayala

Badge Number 2128

End of Watch 4/4/2010

Crazy B*tch

I have been so busy lately, I just haven't had a chance to get on and blog about things. Not sure if that really matters to anyone but me, though. However, I had one of those holy-shit-what-did-I-just-do moments last week that I need to write about.

In preparation for leading Sarah's Brownie meeting last Friday, I had to go to Home Depot and pick up some gardening supplies. On Wednesday my after care plans had fallen through, so I rushed out of work to get the girls from school. Knowing that I had a good hour to kill before picking up the little one, I figured that would be the perfect time to get my shopping done.

Of course, I was running late and worried the girls would panic when I wasn't at the school right at dismissal. Thankfully, they weren't the last kids picked up, but they were not pleased that we were taking a detour before heading home. Megan just about melted down over the fact that she wasn't getting a snack right away.

We got to Home Depot and it finally clicked with Megan that we really weren't going home right after school. In an effort to preempt a tantrum, I offered to buy her a snack at the checkout. While Sarah and I picked out what seeds the troop would plant, Megan played on the tractors. We had a few more items to pick up and Megan was about to lose it. We finally get to the check out and there are no snacks, Megan is fit to be tied. We walk outside and I tell them if the snack truck were outside I would have bought them something. Sarah looks around and realizes that the truck was parked way off to the side of the other entrance. The girls run ahead and after quite a bit of deliberation, they finally choose their snacks.

We get to the car and Sarah starts complaining that Megan's pretzel is bigger than her bag of sun chips and that I ate some of her chips and it wasn't fair. Somehow it was all my fault. At this point, I'm trying to drive through the parking lot without losing it, but the constant bickering is killing me. I finally pull over to yell at them and I pull up right on a gentleman getting out of his car. He says to me, "Hey lady, you almost hit me." In my total rage at my kids, I break from my usually calm self and yell back, "whatever, I saw you." Pissed off that he was arguing me and keeping me from unleashing on the kids, my patience melted away and a side of myself that I had never released in public came out. I actually told someone (who was totally innocent) to "screw you"...in front of my kids. I became that crazy parking lot lady that everyone has a story about. I am totally embarrassed and ashamed of myself. I guarantee that man was walking away muttering to himself, "crazy bitch".

99 Things I ought to have done

Found this on a friend's blog, and thought I'd share mine.

Instructions:
Copy the list, bold the ones you've done (with explanations if needed), share with friends.
1. Started your own blog
2. Slept under the stars
3. Played in a band (does a school band count?)
4. Visited Hawaii
5. Watched a meteor shower
6. Given more than you can afford to charity
7. Been to Disneyland
8. Climbed a mountain
9. Held a praying mantis
10. Sang a solo
11. Bungee jumped
12. Visited Paris
13. Watched a thunder and lightning storm (nothing beats a summer storm!)
14. Taught yourself an art from scratch
15. Adopted a child
16. Had food poisoning
17. Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
18. Grown your own vegetables
19. Seen the Mona Lisa in France
20. Slept on an overnight train
21. Had a pillow fight
22. Hitch hiked
23. Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
24. Built a snow fort
25. Held a lamb
26. Gone skinny dipping
27. Run a Marathon
28. Ridden in a gondola in Venice
29. Seen a total eclipse
30. Watched a sunrise or sunset
31. Hit a home run
32. Been on a cruise
33. Seen Niagara Falls in person
34. Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
35. Seen an Amish community (Lancaster county, Pennsylvania)
36. Taught yourself a new language
37. Had enough money to be truly satisfied
38. Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
39. Gone rock climbing
40. Seen Michelangelo’s David
41. Sung karaoke
42. Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt (I was a child on a trip visiting family in Montana, but won't ever forget it)
43. Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
44. Visited Africa
45. Walked on a beach by moonlight
46. Been transported in an ambulance
47. Had your portrait painted
48. Gone deep sea fishing
49. Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
50. Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
51. Gone scuba diving or snorkeling (snorkeling in the Bahama's on a trip with a girlfriend)
52. Kissed in the rain
53. Played in the mud
54. Gone to a drive-in theater
55. Been in a movie
56. Visited the Great Wall of China
57. Started a business
58. Taken a martial arts class
59. Visited Russia
60. Served at a soup kitchen
61. Sold Girl Scout Cookies
62. Gone whale watching (had the chance to when I went to a conference on Cape Cod, but was the typical "good girl" and didn't play hooky with the others--should have!)
63. Got flowers for no reason
64. Donated blood, platelets or plasma (can't anymore due to some weird results 2o years ago)
65. Gone sky diving
66. Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
67. Bounced a check (not proud of this one. Total accident- bank read one of my checks written for $200 as $700 and it messed everything up!)
68. Flown in a helicopter
69. Saved a favorite childhood toy (it's still at my mom's- Sorry Mom!)
70. Visited the Lincoln Memorial
71. Eaten caviar
72. Pieced a quilt
73. Stood in Times Square
74. Toured the Everglades
75. Been fired from a job (It was a temp job. I took a day off to take my brother to get his wisdom teeth out. I thought they told me they would call me when I had another job assigned. They thought I would return to the site I was at before I took the day off-they told me not to come back when I didn't show up)
76. Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
77. Broken a bone
78. Been a passenger on a motorcycle
79. Seen the Grand Canyon in person
80. Published a book
81. Visited the Vatican
82. Bought a brand new car
83. Walked in Jerusalem
84. Had your picture in the newspaper
85. Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
86. Visited the White House (as a child, my girl scout troop went down to see the trees decorated inside. I don't remember much of it)
87. Killed and prepared an animal for eating
88. had chickenpox
89. Saved someone’s life
90. Sat on a jury
91. Met someone famous
92. Joined a book club
93. Got a tattoo
94. Had a baby (times 3)
95. Seen the Alamo in person
96. Swam in the Great Salt Lake
97. Been involved in a law suit
98. Owned a cell phone
99. Been stung by a bee

Wow, I've only done 34 of these things. Clearly, I haven't done enough